It’s a very spooky Podcasting Day starring the Internet’s own Jason Pargin! Listen here!
Also listen to this: buy his best-selling books including Zoey Punches the Future in the Dick, now in paperback.
Here was the plan: As a special Halloween treat, Jason was going to join me and Brockway to make fun of Bordello of Blood, the Dennis Miller horror comedy from 1996 which, and this is going to shock you, sucks!
Instead, we ended up talking about our new favorite thing– behind-the-scenes complaining about a film’s production and principal star by the people whose careers he tried to ruin. Maybe did ruin? The point is, we mostly talk about Tainted Blood, a documentary about why Bordello of Blood sucks featuring all the cast and crew of Bordello of Blood except Dennis Miller.
We hear from Corey Feldman who is upset that Dennis Miller didn’t want to take his writing advice or his acting advice or be his friend! We hear from Erika Eleniak, serious actress, who wanted all the sexuality written out of her part! We also hear from Erika Eleniak who is upset they cut the part where her character was an overweight porn star named Chubbie O’Toole! We hear from Corey Feldman about why Erika Eleniak didn’t want to be his friend or “work on their brother / sister chemistry!”
This means we forgot to talk about the actual film Bordello of Blood, which also means my detailed notes and discussion outlines went to waste. For instance:
If you ever wanted to see how I watch movies and how a real, professional podcast gets produced, this is it. And here are my (completely wasted) thoughts on the suddenly fantastic climax of Bordello of Blood which I thought we would discuss for at least 45 minutes:
Oh, looks like I left myself a note to rip a gif from the scene where Angie Everhart flips off Dennis Miller. Sure, okay. You’re welcome, Internet. And strictly so Google can help future generations find this gif, fuck you, Dennis Miller. Fuck Dennis Miller, Dennis Miller you can fuck yourself. Here’s a middle finger, you fucking hack, Dennis Miller fuck you. Fuckyoudennis.gif
I was most excited to talk about the actual movie Bordello of Blood because Erika Eleniak was already a vampire by this point of the movie, and this entire Act 3 was for nothing– a hilarious mixup between the screenwriter and himself. You can see in my notes the exact moment this occurs to me:
It looks like I left myself another note to create a gif, this time of the Jesus laser that comes out of Dennis Miller’s dick and makes everyone cum. What a treasure. What a payoff. Truly some of the boldest acting decisions any performers have ever made.
Google, people are going to want to find this, so pay attention to these keywords: Dennis Miller Jesus laser orgasm Angie Everhart orgasm Erika Eleniak orgasm cumming FFM laserplay:
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