Learning Day: The GIFTionary

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10 replies on “Learning Day: The GIFTionary”

The gala idea is truly terrifying. Oh a big party thrown in my honor? Well guess I have to immediately go feral in an attempt to escape this lesser circle of hell.

you have to be very careful about which couples you give the pear gift to; the words for “pear” and “separation” sound the same in mandarin, so giving pears as a gift in china indicates you hope the recipient’s family separates (or that you two stop being friends, i guess). great gift for couples you think are terrible together, though!

if you want a really fun gift to insult someone, look up what gifting a man a green hat means in china

Or right before that state where they are the hardest known material on the face of the planet. There is no in-between

Bosc pears are always in that state. They’re the Russet potato of the pear world.

Besides the big three gift occasions Lydia’s mentions (four if you have friends with infants), I can think of only two others and both already direct the form of the gift: contributing to Patreons for creatives and contributing to GoFundMes for those consumed by the abounding pitfalls of contemporary society.

If you gave me Andy Dick on Father’s Day, I’d be pretty disappointed with you. Not surprised, of course, but still disappointed.

But if you gave me a “Daddy’s Dozen” Andy Dicks, well, I’d love you almost as much as the kids I had with “Other Mommy.”

“Huck Finn and whatever the other gentleman’s name was.” Is the funniest way of making me say something horrible in my own head anyone ever thought of.

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