Welcome, đźŚs, to your day of appreciation. We’re awesome. We know that. We know it so hard that we bake cakes of each other’s faces and devour them in secret places.
But this isn’t about us. This is about you. Did you know you’re awesome? Because you are. We have proof!
First let’s check in on Sissyneck Corner, where the love of a good woman and the love of a good episode of Rockford Files are pretty close, after all.
Our boy’s been having perfectly natural dreams, but public school education failed him and daddy never gave him the Sea-Doo talk.
Sissyneck frequents a restaurant with an “Almost” wall, that narrows it down. He must be in Idaho, the Almost State.
Now let’s move on to the Comments, where we get a new Nicolas Cage Fact!
Who knew, right? Truly life is an adventure in learning.
LyraV is the picture of sincerity, but Sean is uncomfortable with emotional support in a very strange, ultra-specific, extremely relatable way.
There’s perfectly reasonable context for Most Powerful Alex’s comment, but it is wholly unnecessary.
Gabriel Sabloff, the director of Revelation Road, read Lydia’s column on it! His feelings were hurt because a whole team worked on his movie, and as we all know if more than three people work on something it’s not allowed to be bad. Too bad only one person worked on this comment, Gabriel!
Now on to the Discord, where Flippant Sausage entrenches himself in the oldest philosophical debate, while Yeyo becomes mired in the third oldest.
(The second oldest philosophical debate is whether or not God could create a dinosaur hog so huge even he couldn’t crank it.)
TommyG made a Seanbaby action figure, now complete with baby! The baby in no way affects the combat prowess of the Seanbaby action figure.
Yeyo gives Seanbaby the Nathfield treatment. This requires some explanation: Nathen Mazri started a restaurant called Garfield Eats, quickly went insane with that laughable amount of power and lost the rights to Garfield which should be impossible since there are licensed Garfield enemas, then tried to start his own Garfield ripoff but because of the whole insanity thing wound up merging himself with Garfield to create Nathfield. So the joke here is that if Seanbaby went the same kind of insane, but with 1900HOTDOG favorite Heathcliff it would-
You know what? It’s Seanbaby in a funny hat.
The greatest surprise to come out of Seanbaby’s column on the Christian clowning book, God’s Clowns, is that upon further research author Pastor Gaddy was somehow not a murderer. Not only that, he was actually super chill and even proactive about LGBTQ+ rights. Adrienne honored him the only way youth pastors will ever understand – a clumsy rap.
Mo and Badger became best friends after the Godfrey Ho Teamworking Day introduced them to the concepts of Ninja Law and Ninja Justice.
They have since become a powerful foe, their tagteam attack is unblockable and requires impeccable timing to even dodge.
Thrillho was having a little difficulty with Lydia’s “Goop Sex Toy or Modern Art” quiz, so he came to the Discord for help, only to find GDC has a very particular set of skills.
Over on Twitter one of our of favorite artists, Brett Ellefson, made some new Dogg Zzone 9000 fanart! This time about the podcast on… oh no, Todd McFarlane’s Twisted Land of Oz.
You know what? We don’t know art, but we know what gets us hard. This was surprisingly tasteful erotica, Brett. Fantastic work on the packages in particular.
Now it’s time to announce our winner, and it’s… this can’t be right, it’s Revelation Road director and self-googling sadsack Gabriel Sabloff! We were wrong earlier, more than three people must have worked on this comment, meaning it’s great!
Gabriel, you are the new custodian of our most precious artifact: This picture of Grace Jones where she looks like a sexualized Raiden. All we request is that you get at least two more people to help you look after her.
Our previous winner, BorsukKumpelRyb, played a little trick on us by photoshopping the picture so the hat comes down onto her forehead making it look like she’s wearing a vinyl wicker headband as though she studies Patio Karate but holy shit, that was in the original photo!
You folks are, as always, the best. And if anyone ever questions that, you call us. We’ll recruit Lydia and beat the shit out of them – they can’t prosecute more than two people for any crime!
19 replies on “Hot Dog Appreciation Day: Please Google This Revelation Road Director Gabriel Sabloff 🌔
Well, now I feel kind of bad about laughing at the Revelation Road column. Not bad enough to stop, though.
Also, maybe just me, but did anyone else get the sense that Gabriel himself has to leave his personal feelings about David at the door when he directs these movies?
Gosh, I wish I could read what was said about me. But this, it seems, is available only to Patreon members. When you make a film with someone, you form lifelong friendships, not only with cast, but with crew. I’ve made 7 films with David A.R. White. So we’re quite good friends and colleagues. A lot of the things said about him on the web I find quite unfair, and frankly rude. People who take big swings and chances in life I think are deserving of a bit more respect. David is a self-made movie mogul, who co-created a small empire with a successful movie production and distribution company. He launched his own digital streaming service that was recently sold to Sony. Trust me, we get it, you don’t care for faith-based content, and probably never will. As an atheist myself, I do truly try to write these movies to appeal to a wider audience. Again, I hope you’ll give my new series a chance – it’s much bigger budget then the features and there’s some really cool stuff in store. No, it’s not going to compete with an HBO or Disney series as they have literally 95 million more dollars then we did. 🙂
Who idea was it to let Kevin Sorbo dress like that Gabe
As a fellow creator, lemme give you some unsolicited advice: never respond to reviews, positive or negative, sincere or mocking. The most gentle response will still seem defensive and leave you open to more criticism.
Yes, I agree. Haha. I have given that advice to others too. Who knew that a very mild push back comment would result in such a huge kick to the bee hive. 🙂 But sometimes it’s worth it to a try to offer an olive branch to your most giddy critics.
Hold on, we spent like five bucks to make fun of your movie and you can’t drop us three in return for this heat?
Fine. This is a monthly feature called Appreciation Day where we discuss and reward community engagement. It’s never been free. But 1900HOTDOG has a rule that if something’s funny enough we will break any rule.
Congratulations, Gabriel! You have just become funny enough.
For transparency’s sake, I wrote the Appreciation Day post and the several jokes about your hilarious logic.
Everyone, the Prime Directive DOES NOT apply here. Gabriel came to us. You are free to engage. However, please keep in mind that while what Gabriel is doing here is extremely funny, what he’s NOT doing here are bad faith copyright strikes, brigading, or pretending to be his own lawyer to our ISP. This is the most reasonable way anyone has ever come at us, so keep that same level of respect.
I would totally send you three bucks. 🙂 Tell me where to send it. I would never attack someone for saying my low budget movie was ridiculous. Of course it was. The new Rev Road series is even crazier, hope you check it out.
This is actually a great attitude to have. The only true creative sin is being boring. You really turned this around, and it may be an evil genie scenario but I’m definitely checking it out. This is pro level marketing.
see now im glad you won the appreciation day artifact.
Yep, Gabe’s a good sport. I’ll check it out.
Take care of our lady, Gabriel! You’ve earned her!
Well, this comment earned you at least one additional stream. Well done.
It’s the wedding I always dreamed of, the pics are going to be priceless.
Fun fact: Brian Bosworth, co-star of the Revelation Road series, had a tendency to party a bit too hard while he was playing football for the University of Oklahoma.
And, more than once, my family saw him cursing and shaking the locked gates of the local impound lot while we were going to church Sunday morning because Brian also had a tendency to park his sports car wherever he damn well pleased prompting it to be towed. Good times.
Well, I’d like to say that you have been quite the good sport about it all, Gabriel. Religious, well, anything tends to give me the prickly heats, but if you also say that you’re an atheist, well, OK then. Lol. Can’t fault you for trying to make a buck from the religious set, as they’re usually pretty easy to cater to (just ask any televangelist), and I’m of the mindset that any film can be entertaining if you’re either drunk enough or in the right mindset (so long as it isn’t boring, if you’re gonna go whole hog bad, then just OWN it like you’re Tommy Wiseau). Just keep the more virulent proponents of hatred like Sorbo or Baio away from them and it’s all good! Also, you make sure to take care of Grace. Seanbaby kept that picture in an ark that would kill anyone that came within 10 feet of it instantly without first saying the correct Klingon warrior’s chant, and only Sean and Brockway know that particular chant, so it’s not only a priceless heirloom, but it’s also got the blood of 20 people on it’s fraying corners. Enjoy!
Comments are closed on the Revelation Road post, but I needed somewhere to post this information – I went over to James Denton’s Wikipedia page because I was curious to see if the sexy plumber from Desperate Housewives was on the road to doing a full Sorbo or some such (ie. “he found Christianity after his role on Housewives and renounced the sin portrayed therein”).
That movie is omitted from his Wikipedia. It is nowhere to be found. It appears on his IMDB. We know it happened. But I like to think that Jimmy just monitors his Wikipedia page and any time anyone tries to add Revelation Road 3, he clicks that “edit” button and mutters “no… not today…”.
Comments shouldn’t be closed on anything. What does it say when you try to leave one?
Looks to be a time limit thing; older articles just say “Comments are closed” at the bottom. There’s no form to try to post.
Yep, that was turned on. Fixed!