This is your brain on Hot Dog.
Have you tried to explain to your friends, family, coworkers, parole officer, or religious official what exactly 1900HOTDOG is? Have you had problems expressing comedy for smart people that somehow makes them dumber, but in a helpful way? That strange paradox of education against your will, but education that you still seek out each day?
Well struggle no more, we have exactly what you need.
Wake up with a swift kick to your braindick in our classic cut shirt. Wear it on dates, to funerals, or even to your court hearings! You’ll be dressed to impress no matter the occasion.
And don’t worry, we are just getting started. We’ve got the women’s cut ready for you to show off the exact feeling you get when you learn about a sex cake baker that is also somehow a cannibal who ran a children’s show for eleven years.
It’s winter time! You hate sleeves, I hate sleeves, the entire system is built to oppress people like us, but we have your back! And your front! Just not your arms! Pop on one of our tanktops and flex your 100% pure beef arms without fear of ripping your new shirt.
Hoodies! Hoodies are the best because you can wear them when it is cold, or when it is hot, you can cry in them and nobody can see. You are ungovernable when in a hoodie, so why not get one with a cool ass hot dog popping a field goal right in the brainbag.
Okay, maybe you have enough clothes. You’ve got like three pairs of pants and 91 shirts, and it’s not like we are selling socks. But do you have enough mugs? Yes. Should you get more anyway? Also yes. This graphic pops so hard on our mugs, I can’t choose a favorite color to pair it with.
And after a hard day at work, you just want to come home and enjoy a nice beverage in your fanciest glass. Maybe that fancy IPA you got, or maybe ketchup and chocolate syrup with lemonade. It’s all you, dogg!
Bigfeets of Black Water Micro-rib Tank Top!
You’ve caught him. Now what are you gonna do with him? Oh shit I just realized it is pi day, I should have done something for that. Well damn. Maybe next year. In the meantime, go buy this sick ass tank top!