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Hot Dog Store: The Catalog of Cursed Artifacts

Have you seen our catalog of cursed artifacts? The real one, I mean. No? Shit.

Well, in the meantime, why donā€™t you check out our cool Catalog of Cursed Artifacts shirt!

It comes in eight different colors, including one called OXBLOOD BLACK, which I think is this sort of dried blood color for some reason?

So, you know, you got options. Freaky options, but options!

We also have it in a womenā€™s style cut, if thatā€™s more your thing.

If you thought the eight colors with dried blood options shirt was impressive, this style comes in twelve different non-blood-based color varieties.

It wonā€™t protect you from the horrors that are bound to head our way now, but it will cover your torso, and thatā€™s a guarantee.

ā€œBut Hot Dog Store,ā€ you say aloud to your phone while you read this in the bathroom, ā€œI have enough shirts! Donā€™t you have options for those of us with fully covered torsos?ā€

Of course I do! I have everything! Check it out, we have The Catalog of Cursed Artifacts available as a poster. And not just any poster, we are talking about 16 by 20 inches of high quality 10.3 mil, 189 g/mĀ² Japanese paper with an ISO brightness of 104% and a 94% opacity. Hang on, because I need a cigarette after typing that out.

This thing is beautiful. Itā€™s thick, itā€™s bright, and it can double as a lap mat in a pinch.

Not gonna spill any of that clam chowder today. Not a drop. So get one while you can; worst-case scenario, you protect your pants from perpetual chowder spills. Itā€™s win-win!