It’s Podcasting Day and we’re lucky enough to have momentarily lassoed Professional Whirlwind of Chaos, Hana Michels! Follow her on Twitter to track her path of destruction, and check out her Etsy store to buy some cat anuses (see: whirlwind of chaos). We knew the instant we got boring Hana would tip over all of our shelves and start a small fire, so we played a trivia game with her!
If you have cheap shelves or are interested in some with fire damage, please contact us.
It’s time for-
The rules are simple: they’re in the podcast! Why would you need to know them now? This board doesn’t work. It’s just a picture. Go listen to the thing, then subscribe to the thing and review the thing.
In 2004, a struggling TV network decided to create their own American Idol, but entirely out of the good parts. And in 2004, that meant the hilarious audition failures. WB’s Superstar USA was a short-sighted fool’s idea. It was like trying to recreate your bachelor party weekend out of just the diarrhea part. To be clear, this was a show designed to lure bad singers into a Truman Show trap and sometimes try to fuck them!
Listen here, or wherever you get podcasts, to this mean-spirited prank with no exit strategy that went on far too long and may have ruined televised humiliation forever! Our guest is our own audio engineer Jamie Kelly, who is right now learning this podcast isn’t real and Tone Loc and Vitamin C have been watching her pointlessly edit fake discussions about karate movies for months. Everyone you love is robots; you are on DZ’s Superstar 900! Congratulations, Jamie!
Happy Anime Week! On today’s podcast, we’re joined by Supa Kawaii Lydia Bugg to talk about a 30-minute romantic comedy OVA from 1992 called Kennel Tokorozawa.Â
It’s a lighthearted romp about a young girl whose family runs a pet store, and her overprotective dog. Doesn’t sound like our usual thing? We’re covering this one because it’s the only anime that Jimmy Onishi, our favorite rashy little kobold man from Documental, has ever done.
He voices the dog! Hilarious mess Jimmy Onishi as a talking dog was simply too adorable for us to pass up, so we hit play and braced ourselves for some fun!
Welcome, truthseekers, to a podcast the fatcats up at Big Bigfoot don’t want you to hear. Joining us today is Jason Pargin, author of the upcoming If This Book Exists You’re in the Wrong Universe. Pre-order now! The absolutely perfect guest for our show about a telepathic forest ape fighting seven large drunk men with a high school education between them. We’re talking of course about Mountain Monsters on, let me check, Discovery Channel +’s Travel Channel Streaming? Sure, that probably exists.
Other shows leave the mystery up in the air, other shows try to keep still-shine hillbillies away from dangerous traps, other shows don’t even make their Bigfeet psychic! Mountain Monsters is not afraid to say “Bigfoot was right over there and he shook me like a baby.” Mountain Monsters is not afraid to build a man-trap and drunkenly fall in it. Mountain Monsters is not afraid to invent hilarious new kinds of Bigfoot! Mountain Monsters is not afraid to be the perfect show.
The best part of Mountain Monsters is everything, but especially Wild Bill, who is now the unofficial spokesman of 1900HOTDOG because of his ability to do meth, build traps, and not think things through.
Here he is doing so much meth he air-chainsaws:
Here he is nearly dying while building a trap:
Here he is seconds later, nearly dying again from not thinking things through.
Now that we here at 1900🌠have perfected the podcasting format and risen to the top of the talking industry, we’ve invited our old boss Jack O’Brien, creator and host of The Daily Zeitgeist onto the Dogg Zzone 9000 to show him what we can do. And we blow his entire fucking mind. “You guys are the absolute best,” he probably thought.
Join Jack and Brockway on their Seanbaby-led journey from the very first issue of MAD Magazine in 1952 through every imitator leading up to 1958’s Cracked, the knockoff Jack would help adapt into one of the largest and most influential comedy websites where nothing bad ever happened and our legacies will live on forever as hilarity legends. Listen here! Or wherever you get podcasts!
And now for some foot-nooooooootes:
Below are all the clippings pulled for the show. Hate-read them all now, or scroll slowly along with us as you listen! We don’t care! Aside from buying five pieces of merchandise from our store, there are no rules in the Dogg Zzone 9000!
First, here is the two page pro-Apartheid Lionel Richie parody “All-White Song” from Mad Magazine #263 (1986), and yes, you read that correctly:
And here is the haunting final page of the story “Blobs!” from the very first MAD Magazine.
Moving on to 1954’s Panic, here is the baffling letters section of their first issue:
From that same issue of Panic comes these hilarious moments from the story “MY GUN IS THE JURY!“
And still from Panic, here is a zany panel from “THIS IS YOUR STRIFE!” and four wacky ones from “THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS” featuring fan-favorites Butchered Elephant and Actual Blackface Santa.
This is how Panic advertised itself:
Next up is Stan Lee’s take on MAD, 1955’s Snafu featuring Irving Forbush. Here is the three page gag we discuss where Stan Lee asks, “What’s HAPPENED to our Male Singers?“
Moving on to 1956 and Lunatickle, here is the ad for the Fatsex tube designed for watching men change out of their pantyhose!
And here is 1957’s From Here to INSANITY and “The Misfit,” with their take on what Archie would be like if he was a murderer! Also included from this issue is their outrageous ad for Smellzo, which is a pack of wild boars or maybe a can of bad smell? It’s hard to know!
Also from 1957, here is This Magazine is CRAZY‘s knee-slapping take on toothpaste, GLUM! They also did a shocking EXPOSE’ on what four Hollywood starlets would look like if they were secretly men? Wait, no, not how you’re picturing it. They look exactly the same. We don’t get it either!
Now for the 1958 funnybook Zany! You won’t believe how badly their premise of “cows getting drunk on milk” falls apart!
And our last historical document is John Severin’s 789th version of the 1950s’ favorite joke, Loco Magazine’s “SWITCHEROONEY.” In its entirety!
And now you know the dark history of MAD Magazine knockoffery which led us to where we all are today. You’re welcome. Review and subscribe.
It’s a very special religious studies Dogg Zzone 9000, as foretold by Abraham who beget fish which is the Hebrew word for maybeseamonster. We’re joined by science-brained superguest, Katie Goldin, from the Creature Feature Podcast to go through an entire subsection of Sean’s library – Christian Dinosaur Apologetics. She is very frustrated by it!
We used four books as a primer – What is CREATION SCIENCE? by Henry M. Morris and Gary E. Parker, The Great Dinosaur Mystery SOLVED! by Ken Ham, DINOSAURS: THE BIBLE BARNEY & BEYOND by Phil Phillips, and DINOSAURS: Exploring the Scientific Mysteries of God’s Creation by Michael and Caroline Carroll. They don’t all agree on why the Bible got everything wrong, but they all agree it’s the only thing that’s right! Again, Katie found this reasoning very irritating.
Once a general knowledge base was established, we moved on to three enlightening texts. We began with DINOSAURS AND THE BIBLE by Brian Thomas to learn how ancient holy men really only had one word and it meant everything from hippo to quetzalcoatlus.
Next up we read Dinosaurs and the Bible by Ralph O. Muncaster to learn more about how secular dummies are so stupid. Katie was not thrilled with his scientific conclusions.
And finally, we completed our studies with DINOSAURS and the Bible by David Unfred. David Unfred wants to see us all burn, whereupon he and God, Our Loving God, will laugh at the mountains of our ashen bones.
