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Hot Dog Store: Be Cool, Just Click The Link

Shit’s weird this week. Don’t make eye contact, we can get through this as long as we play it smart.

It’s America’s favorite mascot, Jimmy Jiggles!

Look at him on this healthy man. You can be healthy man with shirt. Buy shirt with Jimmy Jiggles! Save a life!

This man has never held a mug in his damn life. You had ONE JOB and now we are all DOOMED because you couldn’t be assed to face Jimmy toward the camera you smug son of a fuck.

What is WITH everyone this week? Something in the air.

Oh boy, it’s worse than I thought.

We are Corey. And if you’re not, you soon will be. Available only in the vault, your ticket to being part of something greater than yourself. You are accepted. You belong. You should buy a shirt.

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Store

Hot Dog Store: A Micro-Rib Women’s Tank Top??

We got a new type of torso cloth in the vault! But before that, check this out:

A true classic.

We got it on shirts in the store. Look, that dude is wearing one and he looks really great in it! You could look exactly like that! You just gotta buy this shirt!

But wait, check THIS out

That’s right, our classic Assembled Dogs mug, just like your great grandmother used to drink absinthe or whatever out of. Yours now for the low price of whatever the store says. What a deal!

Alright, opening up the vault because we have something new in here. Two weeks in a row? You lucky lucky person. I hope nothing horrible is going to pop out of here soon.

There’s something in that corn, and it ain’t no corn.

For the first time ever, Huckleberry vs. Predator is available in six colors on our new Micro-Rib Women’s Tank Top. Featuring art from a syphilitic shark man, this is the only piece of clothing that captures the daily struggle of life in the Appalachian wilderness. Available only in the Vault, grab it while you can!

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Store

Hot Dog Store: The Secret Men – A 1900HotDog Duxcast

It’s SATURDAY and that means one thing, and one thing only:

But first,

Remember that time Brockway and Seanbaby fought all those lava apes? Buy the commemorative shirt available here at these hyperlinked words! It’s something you’ll always want to forget and never will. Now on shirts!

And now for the moment you’ve all been waiting for…

Piss, native boys, erotic brushing. The DuxCast has it all. If only it existed.

But the shirt exists, and is available RIGHT NOW in our vault. Oh we couldn’t let this bad boy go to just anyone. You gotta register your arms as lethal weapons in seventeen states if you buy one of these.

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TEAMWORKING DAY

Teamworking Day: Gun Self-Defense for Ladies

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Hot Dog Appreciation Day

Hot Dog Double Appreciation Day: Nibble the Abgrundwurst

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Hot Dog Store: Catchin’ Up On 2026

We’ve got some stuff coming soon, but in the meantime, let’s take a look at what we’ve got so far.

First off, there were some podcast postcards that came out last week! Here they are in whatever order my computer decided they should be in:

Dogg Zzone 9000 – Episode 261, Deadliest Warrior WEAPONS EDITION with Eddie Doty

Dogg Zzone 9000 – Episode 259, William Wegman: Dog Pervert with Hana Michels

BIGFEETS – Episode 63, The Secret of the Red Shed

Dogg Zzone 9000 – Episode 260, Trancers 2 with Jamie Kelly

BIGFEETS – Episode 62, The Return of Trapper

Dogg Zzone 9000 – Episode 262, Automan with Zak Koonce

Really cool art made by a really cool dude available as little tiny postcards. Like miniature posters you can carry around with you to show people in line at the grocery store. A whole bunch more available over here at this link.

1-900-HOTDOG: THE ALBUM contains 18 theme songs, 23 Extra Wieners, and 1 stunning high res artwork of all 16 of your favorite dogs. Featuring the musical talents of Zak Koonce, Jamie Kelly, Seanbaby, and technically Brockway, 1-900HOTDOG: THE ALBUM is the perfect theme music for any occasion, from the bedroom (fucking) to your neighbor’s carport (also fucking). You can fuck to this album. You can only fuck to it. You’re not allowed to do anything else but fuck while playing it.

Available only on our patreon.

Ok, that’s the last time I’ll post about the album for a while. I promise.

Anyway check this out, come in here real quick…

Get your hunks in week form!

That’s right, this week in the vault we have the 1-900-HOTDOG HUNK WEEK shirt available in the hunkiest of cuts, our incredible V-Cut. You know you want it, you know you need it. Unlock the vault and submit to your hunkiest desires.